Men: this one won’t be for you today as much as it will be for the gals. But, hey, you might learn a tip or two, so here goes. [I wrote this a few years ago…but I am amazed how timeless it has become.] Enjoy…
If you’ve heard about or seen the movie by the title, Mean Girls, you will totally get this next few paragraphs. If not, I would still bet it won’t be too foreign of a topic for you. It’s when I see clips from this film or moments in television that play out this evil scenario that I come to relive a memory or two of what went on in junior high and high school. In those brief moments I, too, remember that I had to deal with those “types” of girls growing up.
You know the ones. They just can’t stand to see you succeed. They don’t want to share the limelight if you are in the same room as they are. Or, if you don’t’ dress like they do or live the lifestyle they live, you are deemed inferior. Your jokes just aren’t as funny as theirs. The most popular girl isn’t your friend, it’s their best friend – and you’re not. And that about wraps it up. Bringing back any memories from childhood?
You see, that’s what gets to me. I really thought that you left those mean girls behind once you entered adulthood. Silly me. I thought people actually did just that–Grow up.
But alas. Some do not. A friend of mine was relaying to me recently the abuse she has been personally taking of late. I am amazed at the juvenile behavior that exudes from some women. Yes, I am talking about the “grown-up, mean girls” of our every-day world. You know the ones. They gossip about you and work to make your life miserable. But you can’t seem to figure out why. What I find most interesting, however, is that what they accuse you of, they seem to have mastered as a personal art form. It’s just that they don’t see it that way.
I then began to share with my friend that I could relate. I too had a gal I knew that just couldn’t can’t stand to congratulate, encourage, or compliment me. On the contrary, she had to get little digs in when a simple pat on the back truly was in order. My friend simply had this response after I finished sharing my confusion at the situation: “She’s a bully.” Wow. That brought perspective home. She was right!
Ok, so enough negativity, but what I am attempting to say is this, the next time someone gets their fix or their kicks out of bringing angst to your life, rather than let it ruffle your feathers take this approach: Pity them. Feel sorry for the people that share the same household or office that they do. (Imagine what those folks nearest the offender are actually going through?) It just might ease some of your pain. The point is, if someone is bound and determined to upset you or keep you “humble”, then they are certainly dealing with some major stuff of their own.
So, next time that “mean one” comes at you or me, let’s just take a deep breath. Then let’s remember to sit back, relax and keep all hands and arms inside the car while traveling. Life is a bit of a ride anyway, to be sure, so let’s simply agree together to not let any of these Les Miserables throw us from the train! K? 🙂
Just my thoughts.
S.
